So you got a job offer. Congrats! But that number they proposed? Feels a bit low doesn't it? I remember staring at my first "real" job offer thinking "Is this it?" Thing is, most employers expect you to negotiate. Yet 70% of people just take the first offer. Why? Because figuring out how to counter offer salary feels like walking through a minefield.
Let's cut the nonsense. I've negotiated salaries for myself and coached hundreds through this. Some won big, others crashed hard. I once panicked and blurted out "I'll take whatever you're offering!" during a negotiation. Cringe. That mistake cost me $15k that year. This guide fixes those errors with street-tested tactics.
Before You Open Your Mouth: Prep Work That Actually Matters
You wouldn't go to battle without armor. Negotiating salary? Same deal. Skip this prep and you're just guessing.
Finding Your Magic Numbers
Google "software engineer salaries" and you'll get useless ranges like $60k-$250k. Not helpful. Here's what works:
- Check Levels.fyi for tech roles (shows exact company/level data)
- Use Salary.com's "Cost of Living" calculator when comparing cities
- Call recruiters and ask "What's realistic for X role in Y city?"
| Experience Level | Average Base Salary (US) | What Top 20% Earn |
|---|---|---|
| Entry Level (0-2 yrs) | $58,000 | $72,000+ |
| Mid-Career (3-5 yrs) | $78,000 | $105,000+ |
| Experienced (6-10 yrs) | $102,000 | $140,000+ |
See that gap between average and top earners? That's negotiation territory. But don't just copy those numbers. Adjust for:
- Your niche skills (AWS certifications add 12-15% in tech)
- Industry pain points (Healthcare IT pays 8% above market)
- Company funding stage (Series C startups have cash, seed-stage? Not so much)
When I negotiated my last role, I discovered through LinkedIn that their "senior" title required 8 years experience. I had 11. So I pushed beyond their initial range using Payscale's report showing local premiums for my specialty. They came up $14k.
Your BATNA Isn't Just Corporate Jargon
BATNA = Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement. Translation: Your walk-away point.
Calculate your absolute minimum before talks start. Include:
- Current expenses + 20% buffer (life happens)
- Cost of changing jobs (commute? Healthcare changes?)
- Opportunity cost (that other company interviewing you)
The Counter Offer Conversation: Not Just About Numbers
Timing is everything. Bring up money too early? You look desperate. Too late? They've mentally spent the budget.
When to Drop the Counter Bomb
- ✅ After they've said they want you (verbal offer)
- ✅ Before signing anything (obviously)
- ❌ During first interviews
- ❌ When they say "What are your salary expectations?" (deflect with "I'm flexible based on total package")
Actual Scripts That Don't Sound Robotic
Forget those "leveraging synergies" scripts. Real humans talk like this:
"I'm really excited about this opportunity. Based on my experience with [specific skill] and market research for this role, I was anticipating something closer to $X. Is there flexibility here?"
Or if they lowball:
"Thank you for the offer. I noticed the base is below market for someone with my [quantified achievement]. Could we discuss adjusting to $Y? I'm confident I can deliver [specific value]."
The Non-Money Stuff That Boosts Your Package
Base salary stuck? Pivot to:
| Negotiable Item | Typical Value | How to Ask |
|---|---|---|
| Signing Bonus | 5-15% of salary | "Could we bridge the gap with a one-time signing bonus?" |
| Remote Work Flexibility | ≈ $8k/year value (per Buffer study) | "Would 3 remote days/week be possible?" |
| Professional Development Fund | $2k-$10k/year | "I'd love an annual training stipend to stay current" |
My friend got stuck at her desired salary ceiling. Solution? An extra week of vacation. She calculated that was worth $4,200 to her. Sometimes freedom > cash.
Handling Their Objections Without Sweating
They WILL push back. Here's how top negotiators respond:
Objection: "This is our standard package for this role."
Reply: "I understand. Given my specialized experience in [area], could we discuss an exception?"
Objection: "We don't have budget for that."
Reply: "Would revisiting this in 6 months after I've delivered [specific project] be possible?"
Objection: "Other candidates accepted this offer."
Reply: "I'm committed to bringing unique value through [skill]. Let's find a number reflecting that."
When They Say No: Your Move
Sometimes they won't budge. Now what?
- Ask for performance review in 3-6 months with written increase terms
- Request equity if base can't move (early-stage startups love this)
- Get creative: Flex hours, project bonuses, expense accounts
Walk away if:
- The gap is >15% below market
- They get hostile about negotiation
- Your BATNA is better (that other offer)
I once had a CEO slam his fist when I countered. Red flag! Took another offer paying 20% less but with great culture. Best decision ever. Toxic money isn't worth it.
Salary Negotiation FAQ: Real Questions I Get
Can counter offering ruin my job offer?
Professional negotiation rarely kills offers. But tone matters. Demanding = bad. Collaborating = good. If they withdraw because you asked reasonably? Bullet dodged.
Should I reveal my current salary?
Hell no. In 21 states it's illegal for them to ask. Try: "I'm focused on fair market value for this role." Redirect like a politician.
Email or phone counter offer?
Phone first. Email leaves paper trails they overanalyze. Voice builds rapport. Follow up with email summarizing agreements.
How much higher can I counter?
7-15% above offer is safe. 20%+ if you have competing offers or rare skills. Beyond 25%? You'd better be a unicorn.
Mistakes That Make You Look Amateur
- Not practicing your pitch aloud (you'll stumble)
- Focusing only on salary (total comp matters)
- Ghosting after negotiating (burn bridges)
- Accepting verbally without written confirmation
Post-Negotiation Checklist
When they say yes:
- Get EVERYTHING in writing before resigning current job
- Clarify start date, title, reporting structure
- Send thank-you email confirming details
Final thought? Companies budget 10-15% for negotiation wiggle room. Leaving that money on the table costs you over $500k in lifetime earnings. Learning how to counter offer salary isn't greedy – it's smart career hygiene.
Still anxious? Practice on a recruiter for a job you don't want first. Mess up there? No harm. Then apply your polished how to counter offer salary strategy when it counts.
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